Advance Happy New Year Eve 2019

Wish You Happy New Year 2019

Best Funny New Year’s Resolutions 2019 For All

In this blog post, you will be able to get the best Funny New Year’s Resolutions 2019 for all. Share these funniest Happy New Year’s Resolutions 2019 with your loved ones and bring a smile on other’s face. These Funny New Year Resolutions 2019 will help you to laugh and enjoy the moment in a funny way. Let us see how these Happy New Year Funny Resolutions 2019 will bring a smile to your face.

Best Funny New Year’s Resolutions 2019 For All:

I will stop exercising because it is such a waste of time.

I will not bore my boss by with the same excuse for taking leaves. I will think of some more excuses.

I will stop sending e-mails to my wife.

I will think of a password other than “password” or “hello”.I will stop considering other people’s feelings when they so obviously don’t consider mine – if that unwashed fellow sits next to me again, I’ll tell him he stinks!

New Year Funny Resolution Quotes

I resolve to stop poisoning my family with my cooking.

New Year Resolutions About Weight Management
I will lose weight by hiding it somewhere you’ll never find it.
I will gain enough weight to get on The Biggest Loser.
I will buy new clothes big enough to account for next year’s holidays.
I will start smoking to lose weight
I will lose weight by inventing the anti-gravity machine
I will lose weight by living on the moon
I will find a more accurate scale
I will build biceps by increasing reps of Ding Dong curls to 3 sets of 15
I will stop buttering my doughnuts

I will go back to school to avoid paying my student loans.

Funny New Year Year’s Technology Related Resolutions
I will watch more cute and cuddly kitten videos on YouTube
I will check my work e-mail account at least once this year
I will witch my username to “password” and my password to “username” to make each a lot harder for hackers to figure out
I will watch less T.V…. in standard definition
I will stop buying worthless junk on eBay because QVC has better specials
I will start using Facebook for something other than Farmville and stupid quizzes
I will help kids stay safe by not texting on my cell phone while eating McDonald’s and speeding through crosswalks in school zones with a frost covered windshield
I will avoid fingertip soreness by learning to play “Rock Band,” instead of a real guitar
I will start a blog about how I would write more often if I had something important to write. Only make one blog entry and leave it published for years
I will talk with a robot voice all the time

New Year Jokes One Liners

I will leave my brain at home while going to watch the supposedly scary movies.

I will eat more nice things like candy, Big Macs, popcorn, and ice cream. Eat less crap like fresh fruit, vegetables, and soy nuts.

I will not eat medicine just because it looks like candy.

I will not hang around girls because they think I love them.

I will learn what the “resolution” means.

I promise to stick to these resolutions for more than a week.

I will eat more nice things like candy, Big Macs, popcorn, and ice cream. Eat less crap like fresh fruit, vegetables, and soy nuts.

I will watch more TV. It’s very educational. Catch up on all those programs you missed down the years.

I will play more computer games. Scientists say they’re good for me and improve my visual skills.

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